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Dream Dates Come True on Temptation Island 2/26/01 Temptation Island Fans, hang on. It's been a long wait, but the buzz is that it will be worth waiting for. Entertainment Weekly's EW.com quotes host Mark L. Walberg: "There's more action coming than we've seen so far. All I can say is that there is a little shocker, and what happens from now on is very intimate." Wow, more intimacy and a shocker! What could Mark L. possibly mean?
Does Valerie actually have a good time on a date? That could be intimate, though it's doubtful; but it would definitely be shocking. Does Mandy make it through an entire episode with her mascara intact? Or possibly without concocting yet another grotesque fashion-don't with her hair? Again, shocking but not very intimate.
So it must be something else. Hmmm. Oh, maybe all the guys decide to 'consummate' their relationships with their dream dates? Okay, you're right, intimate but not at all shocking. Oh, oh! Maybe two of the guys consummate and one of them doesn't! There! Intimate and definitely shocking!
The truth is, we just don't know. But as Mark L. reminds us, "As always on Temptation Island, the couples will have the 'means, motive and opportunity' to consummate these relationships." What does he mean, the means? Money? Do they really have to pay the ho's? Probably not. Who knows what he means by the means.
What about motive? Well, for the 'committed' guys, presumably the motive is nothing more than the fact that they are, in fact, guys. What more do they need, really? What is the motive for the 'committed' gals to consummate? (Are you getting sick of that word, too?). Shannon's motive is obvious - she's dating Andy. Her motive may simply be that she has absolutely nothing to lose. We're not sure that Kaya or Billy have any redeeming qualities, except for the one that stands out most clearly on the show: they're a heck of a lot better than Andy. So we'll reserve judgment on Val-gal and Mandy's possible motives.
As for opportunity, isn't that what the whole show is all about? Just one big two-week long opportunity to cheat? That's, like, the whole premise of the show, isn't it? Are we missing something? Oh, yeah! Testing the relationships, right, haha, we forgot. That's why they're here. Especially the guys, probably. And when they get back with their girlfriends, they'll probably want to spend a lot of time talking about the relationship. Uh huh.
So, we have means, motive, and opportunity stirred in with the promise of more action, more intimacy and a 'little shocker.' What does it all mean? Well, as they say, we'll just have to tune in. But it sounds like they're brewing up some excitement on Temptation Island.
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